I think all moms feel split in half sometimes. I suppose if you have more than one child, you're split again and again. Like part of you is running around outside of their body all the time. It doesn't matter if you're a work-outside-the-home mama or a work-inside-the-home mama, it's incredibly hard. If you've found an easy way to parent, I'd love to hear it.
Between getting myself ready, a distraction of Thomas on TV, a delightful breakfast with Wesley, and some cars, I thought things were going great. Then there was a poop explosion, a tantrum, a few time-outs to regroup and make better choices, and some tears. He literally didn't want me to change his diaper, put on his clothes, or take him in the car to school. Even though he was acting up, I felt so torn. If I was able to move slowly, things would have gone much more smoothly. I wasn't able to slow down - I had meetings and a very busy day. I wanted to drop everything, give Wesley my full attention, and take our time getting out the door.
In order to help me grow as a mom, I'm currently reading Out of the Spin Cycle: Devotions to Lighten Your Mother Load. Jen Hatmaker makes me feel like I'm doing okay while also encouraging me to grow in my relationship with God, my husband, and my little boy. On the other side of the spectrum, I'm also reading Toilet Training in Less Than a Day. That's right, someday Wesley won't wear diapers anymore. Can you believe it? Me either. (That's what he's reading in the picture above...)
Somewhere in between these two extremes is where I live. Doing the best I can to balance my faith, relationship with my husband, job, and my son with my job and calling. Worrying about potty training while leading an event for 400+ people, mostly teenagers. And even though I feel like I'm splitting in half, I wouldn't change it for anything in the world.